It’s Memorial Day, also known as the unofficial start of summer. With summer comes pools, lakes, beaches, and all kinds of other water fun. As Christian ladies, we also know that this is the start of bikini season, because we’ve been hearing for months all of the “lose weight now!” commercials prepping us for this time of year.
But as a Christian woman, I hate it. I hate that not only is the world screaming “look great in your bikini!” but so many of my sisters are saying, “I’ve got to get in shape for bikini season!”. Obviously, there is nothing wrong with exercising and being fit (bodily exercise does have its benefits – 1 Tim. 4:8), but it’s this bikini word that really gets under my skin.
Maybe it’s that younger Emily really struggled with this. I was a thin teenager, and even into my freshman and sophomore college years I grew increasingly skinnier. And I struggled. I had things I knew I could wear, so I wanted to. Not just bathing suits, but tight clothes, short clothes, etc. Being skinny added that new level of temptation to me. Partially, it was because the world was always screaming, “flaunt what you’ve got!”, but it wasn’t made any easier because so many Christian women/sisters seemed to be promoting the same idea.
Well that’s definitely not me anymore.
My issue with bikinis is two-fold. One, bikinis are nothing more than waterproof underwear. Prancing around in our underwear would never be accepted, under any circumstances, and yet we think that because we’ve labeled it “bikini” that it’s somehow fine. However, from the Bible’s description of nakedness (see Adam and Eve in the garden pre and post fig leaves) we know that it isn’t ok and it never has been. How much respect would we have for such great women of the Bible as Esther or Abigail or Ruth if the Bible told us that they ran around in their under-garments (which still would have been much more modest than modern-day bikinis)? That’s not the picture we conjure up of God-fearing, God-obeying women, so why are we excusing ourselves? I, for one, want to be a God-obeying woman like so many of those women in the Bible, and it starts with presenting my physical body in a pure, holy fashion before God and before the men (who have ever-tempted souls) around me.
The next issue I have is particularly for married women and bikinis. I have seen countless tweets, posts on Instagram, and Pinterest boards of inspiration centered around bikinis and swim-ready bodies. First and foremost, you’re married. That bikini-body you’re trying so desperately to get, well, it doesn’t really matter. At least, it doesn’t matter in a public way. The only person who should be seeing you in your itty bitty bikini is the one person who already controls your body (1 Cor. 7:4). And chances are, they love your body just the way it is.
And if you don’t love the way your body looks, why are you SAYING THESE THINGS OUT LOUD!? Let’s learn to have some shame around the marriage bed. No, the marriage bed isn’t shameful, it’s honorable (Hebrews 13:4), but do we need to be talking about the intimate goings-on of our marriage bed? I think that also means we don’t need to be talking about how good our bodies are going to be looking in our underwear. We don’t need to be conjuring up those images in anyone’s heads but our own husbands.
1 Peter 3:4 tells Christian women that they are to focus on attaining incorruptible beauty (a gentle and quiet spirit). We aren’t supposed to be seeking after perishable beauty so we can flaunt our bikini bodies when we hit the beach. We aren’t supposed to be self-seeking at all. Instead, we’re Christ-seeking, which means we’re modesty-seeking, purity-seeking, and holiness-seeking. You decide if you can do that in a bikini. I only know that I can’t.
It’s Modesty Week here on emilyhat.com. Be sure to check back throughout the week for more posts on modesty.
Erica Grieves
May 26, 2014 at 8:53 amThanks so much for this post! As we are about to head to a water park for a few days, it was nice to have a reminder to not only monitor what I wear, but start that discussion with my young daughter as well. Looking forward to having fun in the water in a modest way:)
Emily Nelson
May 26, 2014 at 12:53 pmThis is why we are best friends!!! I LOVE this post, in every single way, and completely, 100% agree. Thank you for standing for what is right and being that godly example of what a Proverbs 31 woman should be! Love you so much!
Sheila Landman
May 26, 2015 at 1:57 pmThank you for such a great read!
Leah
May 26, 2015 at 10:10 pmI’m so incredibly uplifted by this post Emily!!! There are so few people who take this stand on modesty. Just because we don’t have the command “do not go around in your underwear” doesn’t mean we don’t have examples of immodesty in the BIble and how it caused shame. Thank you for publicly standing up for what is right and in a loving and kind way presenting it to others.
Caroline
May 30, 2015 at 3:47 pmI have never heard someone call themselves a Christian as much as you just did in that paragraph. If you want to preach the gospel please do, but don’t go and put being a Christian in your trophy case.
Emily
Author May 30, 2015 at 8:05 pmCaroline, I am terribly sorry if I offended you in some way by referring to myself as a Christian more times than you might have deemed necessary. Sometimes I just need to remind myself over and over Whose name I wear so that my actions and thoughts will reflect His nature. I don’t mean to use the term ‘Christian’ in any sort of braggadocious way; I am able to wear the name of Jesus by the grace of God, definitely not by any merit of my own.
Tom bowling
May 27, 2016 at 10:55 amNever apologize for calling yourself Christian, dear.
AC
May 27, 2016 at 10:56 amGood stuff.
Jo Ann Gosson
May 28, 2016 at 2:27 pmI agree with most everything you state. But as Mother’s, if we have male children, their apparel is also very important. I have also seen men not dressed the way they should be. That also leaves a statement to all around, especially our young ladies. I have been to people’ homes and could hardly believe what there son’s were wearing, to swim in, and a lot of us were uncomfortable. This is a message for every one of us to dress appropriately.
Ann
May 29, 2016 at 4:27 pmA wonderful article. Thank you so much. Fewer and fewer women live by the teaching of the scriptures on this subject these days. Keep on teaching!
kim
June 26, 2016 at 8:41 amI just discovered your blog after first discovering your husbands sermons on the church website a few months ago. Our family listens to the sermons most nights before we go to bed. We are all learning so much! Thanks to both of you!
Chantelle
August 11, 2016 at 2:48 amDo all of your friends wear bikinis? That’s the situation I am in. What other styles of swimsuit have you tried? How did you like them?
Mandy
December 14, 2016 at 8:09 amChantellle: We wear board shorts that go to the knee and a rash guard swim shirt. From neck to knee is our rule and this applies to both genders and all ages.