Four years ago today I married the man of my dreams. Really, I married the man of my prayers. A man I had long-since been praying would be standing there at the end of the aisle; a man who would help me get to heaven. God so beautifully answered my many petitions by giving me Robert, and I am beyond indebted and grateful for the life that I have with him.

Four years into this life together, I realize that this life is equal parts everything and nothing like I thought it would be. I never imagined I’d be living in Charleston, South Carolina. I never imagined I’d have a dog and be as obsessed with him as I am. I never imagined being a stay at home wife, a podcaster, or someone who enjoys cooking and laundry. Yet, I knew that life with Robert would be fantastic. I knew that he would be my best friend, biggest encourager, and the greatest example to me. I knew that he would challenge me in his preaching and teaching. I knew that there would be nothing we couldn’t handle together. And I knew he would love me, because he loves the Lord.

So many in our world today are celebrating marriages that aren’t God-approved marriages. Others are living in marriages that aren’t God-approved, though they’re not celebrating. Instead, they’re living mediocre lives, claiming Christ as Lord but living to self and letting their marriages suffer. In both cases, God is not pleased. His plan for marriage has one man committed to one woman for their entire earthly existence. In that bond, they will love and submit, respect and honor each other…mirroring Christ and His bride, the church. Sadly, that’s not most marriages. They either have the people wrong or they have the plan wrong, either way doing marriage in a way God never intended.

As Christians, we need to take marriage back. At one point in the last week or so, I had the fleeting thought that I wasn’t very excited to celebrate our anniversary on the heels of the SCOTUS decision. But that was fleeting, because I quickly realized that I needed to celebrate my marriage. I need to celebrate all Christ-centered marriages. For far too long, Christian marriages have looked just like worldly marriages: ending in divorce or utter unhappiness, with roles either reversed or not even attempted to be fulfilled. But that’s not what God wants. Just like in all things, followers of Jesus are called to be distinct; called to be holy. That holiness should shine forth into our marriages, making them marriages that thrive. Marriages that are abundantly happy, exceedingly blessed, and held up as an example to a watching, lost world.

I know that I am not perfect, nor am I married to a perfect man (though, he is the perfect complement to me).  I know that our marriage isn’t flawless. But I know why our marriage works. I know why we’re happy. I know why he’s still my best friend and why nothing drastic changed after we said “I do,” and it’s because we’re striving to do marriage God’s way. Even when it is hard, inconvenient, or flat out the opposite of what we prefer, we’re choosing God’s plan for marriage over our own opinions or feelings. Because God made marriage, so He obviously knows the best way to do it. He knows how to thrive. He knows what will glorify Him. So why not trust Him, His word, and leave everything else alone? Forget SCOTUS. Forget the world. Forget your friends and even your family. Fully rely upon the Lord to direct your marriage, and it will be a happy one. And even if it isn’t always happy (because it does take two people being committed to God to produce a happy marriage), you can still individually be pleasing to God by doing things His way in your specific role.

So, even when times are difficult, even when it would be more convenient to take the lead or disrespect my husband, or maybe more politically correct to celebrate non-sanctioned marriage, I will still choose God’s way; both for my life and for my marriage. And I hope you’ll do the same.

And, I hope you’ll celebrate Godly marriages with me. We need more of them and we need better examples of them.