Ah, Valentine’s Day. It’s a day where everyone’s all mushy and precious and flowery; where all the stores have sold out of candy and sweet cards and roses. And, of course, those who blog are doing all kinds of lovey-dovey posts.

I’m no exception.

But I think I have a better reason! If this day wasn’t Valentine’s Day, I would still do this post. Because this is the day, February 14th, that Robert and I went on our first date, six years ago today. And that’s a big deal. Especially this year, because we’ve now been married as long as we dated!

So obviously there are some things I’ve learned in the past 6 years, and in all of my married wisdom I will share these lessons with you. After all, I do host a podcast on being a wife, so clearly I am the expert. (Also, please know I am kidding in every possible way—except I do host Wifey Wednesdays). So yeah, here they are, the six things I’ve learned in six years of being with my wonderful now-husband.

1: Falling in love with your best friend/marrying your best friend is totally worth it. Prior to February 14th 2008, there were a lot of people who were sketchy about Robert and I dating, since we were best friends. Two of the main proponents of that argument were Robert and I. We were scared, because if something doesn’t work out…you lose a great friendship. But what we learned after taking the risk was that even if it hadn’t worked out–married women don’t have male friends, and married men don’t have female friends. So it wouldn’t have mattered anyway. =) But, we did take that leap, and it has been well worth it. Marrying your best friends means easy communication, tons of laughter, and few embarrassments. If you’re on the fence about dating your BFF, go for it. You’ll never regret it. And, make sure you vow to always be best friends.

2: Communication makes all the difference. So many people said there’d be so many surprises when we got married, almost like a threat, but there really weren’t. Why? Probably because we were best friends and could talk openly about any appropriate subject. I’ve found that this principle is probably the best one in our marriage, because when I’m upset or hurt or angry or happy or excited, he knows and can respond accordingly. We don’t hold things in and that’s healthy. Being able to talk to each other and not hiding things is crucial to any happy relationship.

3: Reminisce often. The stories of our first kiss and first date get more outlandish each time we talk about them, but that’s what makes it so exciting and fun! It’s nice to have jokes that only the two of you understand, and reminiscing about events special to only the two of you is a great way to have those things.

4: Expose your differences early on and embrace them. Don’t ever try to guilt your spouse into liking something you like, or not liking something you don’t like. Early on, I knew Robert wasn’t a game person. Trying to force him into that was bad news bears. Now, I don’t push it, and that’s fine. He knows there are a HOST of things that I don’t like, and he doesn’t try to get me to do them, and I appreciate that. There are always compromises though. For instance, I like to sing whenever I’m in the car–which, to this point, has been mostly just me or me and my sisters. I married someone who likes silence in the car. So, there’s that. But now, we listen to podcasts! It’s all about compromise, and understanding (and loving!) each other enough to know what to push and what to let go!

5: Those who travel together stay together. My BFF Alyssa and I have always marveled at how well we travel together. It really is a crucial aspect to a relationship. Being married to someone is like a constant vacation. You’re together 24/7, so it’s important to find someone you can travel well with! And, it will also make for fun married memories when you travel somewhere new together, instead of stressful and argument-inducing trips.

6: Serve one another. The Bible tells women to be submissive to their husbands, but it also says we are to be submissive one to another. A marriage should be two people who are now one…both intent on putting the other’s needs first. When you are doing this, you are fulfilling Jesus’ wish – that we might have life and that we might have it abundantly. He wants us to have the best life possible–the best marriage possible! When we do it His way (which is by serving one another), we will have wonderful, happy, blessed marriages.

I am so thankful for the last six years, and for my wonderful best friend.