Recently, I was studying through some New Testament passages about how women should act. As a woman, I find it extremely helpful to know that I’m not the only one who has ever struggled with vanity, with gossiping, and with immodesty. However, every time I study these familiar scriptures, I come away with something new that helps me as I approach God’s ever-relevant Word.

Today, will you look with me to two passages? Let’s start with 1 Pet. 3:3-4. The section starts off by addressing wives, so we know it’s for women. Here’s what the rest says:

“Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”

I’ve heard this verse time and again, especially in reference to modesty and true beauty. However, I rarely focus on the latter part of the verse, which tells us that God finds this kind of woman (gentle & quiet-spirited) precious. That word, precious, is used only three times so far as I can find in the New Testament, all of which relate to women! The first is found when talking about the woman with the alabaster box filled with spikenard to wash Jesus’ feet. The second is used in 1 Timothy 2:9:

” in like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing,”

Now, if you’re like me, you had to reread that to see where precious was located. The only trouble is, it’s not translated precious here: it’s translated costly—which opens us up to a beautiful thought laid out so gracefully by the Holy Spirit.

In our world today (and in the 1st century to be sure!), people are fascinated by expensive things. That’s why Paul had to tell Timothy to admonish the women not to get caught up in all the fancy-schmancy stuff when going to worship. Pleasing God isn’t about the most expensive, lavish thing you can offer. God doesn’t need “our” wealth! And yet, the world deifies material wealth. Our world’s primary focus is what they can get. And as a woman of God, it’s dangerous to go down that road. But, as women, we are very tempted to go down that road, especially in the clothing department. We like for people to think we look good, and so we like name brands and hot new items and latest trends. That’s why Paul says that women of God are not to be caught up in what the world deems worthy.

Instead, going back to 1 Peter 3:4, we are to imbibe attributes which God considers worthy–gentleness and a quiet spirit. Those words actually mean “meek, kind, forgiving, benevolent” and “tranquil”. We are to be women of submission, of peace, of reverence, of kindness. Those things are “expensive” on God’s list. Those are the things that make you stand out in His eyes. Those are the things that make you precious.

Take an inventory of your life. Are you, on average, more consumed (time, thoughts, etc) with trying to impress the world with all of your costly stuff, or are you more consumed with trying to show God your precious characteristics? To be honest with you, that questions hurts my heart, because the answer is that I’m often far too focused on worldly things. But, studying these scriptures helps me, and I do hope it will help you, in trying to please the right One.