Well, I’m at that age, aren’t I? And all of my friends are apparently at that age also. You know the one: where you can’t even assemble with the saints without someone asking if you’re going to have children, or when you plan to have children, or why you don’t already have children, and how many children you want to have…and when. When is always there.

Recently, I was talking to one of my very good friends about all things adoption, childbirth, and children, and I had to stop when I realized I’m that age. The age where all things kid enter into the picture–either in future form (where we are currently, so please none of the aforementioned questions! =P), near-future form (think ultrasound photos you can’t decipher when looking through your Facebook feed), or life-consuming (post-birth through forever). That’s where I am, and where so many of my peers are. And it’s terrifying.

But one of the things we think about (all of us who are women, at some point in our lives) is whether or not we’ll be a good mom. I’ve thought it a million times, in a million scenarios, probably for over a decade! It’s just one of those women-questions, isn’t it? Well, as someone without kids, I’m in the expert years, so I’m here to tell you how you can be a good mom either now or whenever it is you have children.  But seriously, this is how you can be a good mom–and it’s not original to me, so you can actually listen. I can actually listen, since apparently I’m at that age. So here it is, how to be a good mom….

Love God.

Simple, right? But that’s what scripture tells us. Here are a few passages:

“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?” Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the first and great commandment (Matt. 22:37-38).

For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments. And His commandments are not burdensome. (1 John 5:3)

Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one! You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. “And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. (Deut. 6:4-7).

What these passages tell us is this: the greatest command is to love God. To love God is to keep all of His commandments, and when we do that, we then teach them to our children so that they can observe them and show that they, too, love God.

In order to be a good mom, you have to know the Bible. Really, you have to know God. You have to love Him and trust Him and familiarize yourself with Him, otherwise, how can you teach your children? How can you fulfill the commands God has given specifically to you (Titus 2:4-5)?

I’m not in the mom stage yet, but from what I hear, it’s the most hectic life of all. It’s hard to have quiet, alone time with God…because a little someone is always tugging at your attention. And yes, that’s beautiful and wonderful, but it is also hard. What that tells me is, and hopefully tells all of you other pre-moms out there is that we need to be soaking up every single second in preparation for those crazy days. We need to be studying and learning more about God every moment we can so that we have a working knowledge when it’s time to raise those little ones.

I want desperately to be the person God wants me to be, at every stage in my life. I want to be a good wife now (and always), I want to be a good mom one day, and I want to be a good whatever else God throws my way. Until I am a mom, though, I can study and learn and pray in the quiet, peaceful moments I have so that I am equipped with the spiritual armor I need when it’s time to teach them all day long (and isn’t that the point of the Deuteronomy passage?).

To all you moms out there, I so commend you. I know so many of you who are doing so many wonderful things and that’s amazing. But I also know a lot of my friends who are in this pre-stage, and I urge you to commit with me to studying more and falling more in love with our God. We’ll need all of the help we can get when those sleepless nights come!

And hey, if you’re interested in learning wife and mom tips from other Christian women, you can listen to the new podcast from TLN – Wifey Wednesdays!